帮我批下toefl作文

来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/07/04 03:42:29
Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which do you prefer？ Use specific reasons to develop your essay.
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i perfer study in my dorm or studing room,reading books or finding some useful information on internet.i think these are really good ways for me to learn.in short ,i'd like learn by myself.

like all the students, i have to go to school.unfortunately,i do not emerge myself in the environment of studing at school;i always think about other things like what to eat and play after school,i can not concentrate myself.it is really a big problem.both teacher and i found this thing annoying.another disadvantage to study at school is that sometime teacher always try to let the slowest student to know,that wasted a lot of time and made the class boring.i do not like that method of teaching.as a shy person ,i always teesed by my classmates,to some extent ,

"like all the students, i have to go to school"不能作为的原因。而每段必须要开头点明论点。第三段也一样。
结尾最好在点明观点。
"sometime teacher always try to let the slowest student to know,that wasted a lot of time and made the class boring"这句很费解，从句没有主语。"i learned a lot ."这句话放这里什么意思呢，很费解。不能说"go to the study "吧。"i was totally absorbed "我被吸收了？？？"i miss the lunch"没有这样说的吧。" i can never as accomplish this when "as多余了。
还有很多句子比较别扭，比如
第二段"as a shy person "的举例很费解，它和"sometime teacher always try to let the slowest student to know,that wasted a lot of time and made the class boring"有什么关系？？？？ 而且这里的"sometime"应该是"sometimes"吧
总之结构混乱+比较多的语法错误(more than I have pointed out)

第二段你可以这样开头"First of all, I do not like the atmosphere of studing with a teacher."结尾那段"it is a excellent advice that i can let the teacher go to my home to teach me,but that cost a lot that i can not afford