UC知道各位英语大虾，帮我看看我的书面表达有没有错！
来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/06/30 03:18:53
Afrer the wenchuan earthquake, many children were hurt,some are in hospital,and some are out of hospital.Many volunteers want to make children that hurt in earthquake happy on June,1.
On that day,the policeman and children hand in hand,and they went shopping.And university students played with childre that out of hospitaland went to school,they smiled a lot.Doctor gave a toy doll to a little girl who hurt and lay on the bed,the little girl felt very happy. There also sport stars chat with some children who hurt badly,encouraged them to be brave and hoped them go out of the hospital early.The litte patients felt warm and bright.
All the volunteers tried their best to make them happy,and gave them a special Children's Day,a Children's Day that they can't forget forever!
1)用过去时就全部用过去时。所以第一行：are都该改were. 第二行want改成wanted.
2)孩子们被伤害用被动。第二行children that hurt改children that were hurt
3)earthquake特指此次地震，要加定冠词the
4)第二段了。policeman复数改成policemen.
5)hand in hand这句没有动词。改成held hand in hand.
......oh God!发现这样问题太多了。我来重写吧。：）别介意！基本还是照你的！
After the Wenchuan earthquake, many children were hurt, psychologically and physically. Some were in the hospital, and some were not. Many volunteers wanted to help them, especially make them happy on the Children’s Day.
On June 1, some policemen and the children held hand in hand, and they went shopping together. And the university students played with the children, and took them out of the hospital to the school. They smiled a lot. Doctors gave toys to the injured girls in the bed, which made the girls very happy. Sport stars had a chat with those badly injured kids, giving encouragement to them. All the volunteers tried their best to help these unlucky ones, and had brought them a very specia